A Day in NYC

We skipped FAO Schwarz and Ripley's to save time. We went to the big Toys R Us in Times Square - it was jam packed! And we spent less there than we would have at Ripley's for admission. We took a pedi-cab up to the Mars restaurant, not realizing the fee was >per person<. Luckily Blair had the cash, and we really enjoyed the ride (he zipped around and between cars at stop lights). We all had caffeine with our snack on Mars, and our seats were amazing - the third row of the highest balcony. It was very cool when the dancers were making shapes (a la Ziegfeld) to see them from above.

I'm such a geek. I made a spreadsheet of the places we wanted to go and what time we wanted to get there. In between each stop, I pasted a google map showing the route..The only time we got turned around was when we came up out of the Times Square shuttle station in a different spot than it showed on the map, and we walked a block or so in the wrong direction before finding out we'd been right next to it when we got to the street level.

Jekkyl and Hyde's was cool and lots of fun. We ended up spending about double what we'd have paid to eat something similar at Chilis, but the "show" was fun. Mars 2112 was a little more hokey, but fun. We were still pretty full from lunch so we had dessert and caffeine.

We got home a bit after midnight and all slept like logs. I took some motrin before I went to sleep and my leg muscles feel better this morning than I thought they would. Dan's in a fabulous mood and thought the show was awesome.

Nice Little Surprise

I saw the radiation oncologist today and she told me I have only three more treatments! Tomorrow, Thursday and Monday. I was expecting a few more days next week.

Tomorrow, I'm going to the hospital first thing (8:15) so we can go into the city. We bought tickets for tomorrow night's Xmas Spectacular at Radio City (my Jewish hubby has always wanted to go.)

We may or may not get to everything we want to do but our plans include:

• Madame Tussaud's
• a tour of Grand Central Terminal (we've both always wanted to do that)
• Jekkyl and Hyde's restaurant (like eating in Disney's haunted mansion, the men's room is in a secret passage behind a bookcase, how cool is that?)
• FAO Schwarz
• Ripley's museum
• (we have to pick up our show tickets)
• Mars 2112 restaurant (restaurant "on Mars", tee hee)
• the Rockettes

Snowed In

Well, the weathermen kept going back and forth as to whether our part of CT was going to get walloped or no snow at all. We're getting walloped.

My sister posted on Facebook that the wind moved her dog a half foot to the side wheb she took him out. Dumbledore wouldn't even go near the back door when we opened it and encouraged him to go out. Blair took him down to the garage, and shoveled him a little area just outside the garage door - the snow was taller than he was (at least a foot). 

This is reminding me of the blizzard of '96. The state was shut down for two days and I was convinced I would go into labor and not be able to get to the hospital. At least we never lost power. Today though, the wind is blowing so hard that the family room is pretty chilly despite the fact that the heat is on.

This morning, Blair and I got up early-ish (8) to hit the Hallmark store. We got tissue paper and bows which I was out of, but they had no wrapping paper, which I am running low on. It was all only 40% off though. I'm bummed because I'm finally running out of the paper I got for 50% off when Alex was small.

Then we hit the supermarket. What a zoo!! Blair got on line at the service desk to return the Coke he bought by mistake. He was supposed to get Diet Coke to go with the Mentos we gave Daniel for Christmas. I stopped at the hand scanner kiosk and they were all dead (there were only three units in the display). I ran to the other end of the store and there was an out of order sign on the kiosk there. Oh noes! We were going to have to wait on a long line to get out. 

We shopped and got on one of the self checkout lines behind at least 7 or 8 people. I'm leaning on the cart and I turn around to say something to B and he's not there. A little while later, he turns up with a working hand scanner (I guess those three units charged up and he got the last one). We start scanning like mad and packing up our reusable bags, figuring that at least when we get to the head of the line, we'll get out fast. But it got better, the gal who watches over the self service line saw us scanning. She was surprised and checked to make sure it was working OK. The she took us out of line to her station and processed our order, and bang zoom - we were done!

On the way out of the store, we popped the scanner back in the display, so hopefully someone else got lucky too. Once we were in the car, I kept telling Blair that he rocked and that he was "da man". On the way home, I realized I should have grabbed a bunch of scanners from the out of order side and popped them into the empty display. But maybe the woman told someone and they got them working again.

We got home and watched Despicable Me with Daniel. Then I made cheese sticks (wrap string cheese in refrigerator dough and bake according to the directions on the roll package). We all enjoyed them. Blair gave me one of those jewelry armoires (he got a really good deal on one with plenty of drawers, and my current box is overflowing) and I spent the afternoon and evening sorting through the stuff in my old jewelry box, pairing up earrings and such. It was loads of fun (I love sorting and organizing and loved seeing stuff I haven't looked at in a while). Blair and I watched a bunch of old NCISs while I did that.

The hospital massage therapist called to cancel tomorrow's appointment. She may reschedule for later in the week, since she missed last Monday too, due to illness. I probably won't have radiation either. (There's a LOT of snow out there already and it won't quit until tomorrow evening.) I was planning to take a "vacation" day from radiation on Wednesday or Thursday and going into NYC with Dan (who finished all the stuff he owed the English teacher on Christmas Eve!) and Blair, but now I'm thinking I should see if they can take me early in the morning instead, since it'll be 4 days off by the time I get to the hospital.

I felt pretty energetic today (although I did nap for a bit during the day). Maybe it won't take too long to recover my energy once I'm done with the radiation? That'd be nice.

I hope everyone is warm and cozy!

Dan's New Look

Dan's trying a new style. The new clothes seem to be tied with the ipod dock/boombox for best Xmas present.

Weighty Matters

I've been slowly, steadily gaining weight since I opened the store. That coincided with me being happy with my body and allowing myself to partake of the occasional treat. Which lead to my falling off the low carb wagon with an earth shattering thud. (Whenever I had a crop in the store (which was every weekend), there were cookies, and brownies,C and M&Ms, and sometimes cheesecake filling, etc, etc). Then I was in Minnesota and I stuffed my feelings with food. Then I was in California doing the same. I have good intentions, but it doesn't translate to action.

And now I'm over 200 pounds (my previous high was 180 or so). I've never been this big (and I'm only 5'4") - I just had to buy a new coat; I can't zip my coat comfortably. I have hardly any jammies that fit comfortably around the waist. My most comfortable jeans are falling apart (one of the rear pockets is unraveling). I've got reflux and B says I'm snoring sometimes. I get winded going up the stairs.

The first picture is from my graduation party in May of '07, I felt like I was rockin' that dress. The second was taken last month when we saw the president.

Bleh

Blair got a job offer today! The money isn't great, but it's close to home. Before this it was looking like he'd have to take a 4 month maternity replacement gig in a town at least 45 minutes away, plus working weekends for a place that is planning on opening a second building in the fall, and might want him full time then. It's a great relief. We're taking a little money out of his 401K to cover COBRA for a few months, and when he's eligible to join their plan, we can switch to a less expensive plan because I'll be done with treatment.

I'm feeling OK. Mom, a sister and I got together Monday and Tuesday to bake cookies. It really tired me out. Tuesday when I met with the doctor, she said that it's right about the time I should be feeling fatigue from the radiation (speaking of radiation, did you guys hear they want to open up Chernobyl to tourists, how crazy is that?) and that it would get worse before it got better (in maybe a month or so.) I'm starting to get some skin irritation too, and need to be more rigorous about using the cream she prescribed (and doing it more often).

Although it was worrisome (to say the least) to have Blair unemployed, I've been glad to have him with me during the day. He drives me to treatment every day (it's nice to have company). I'm out and about more than I was when I was home alone - and I'm sure I'd sleep more and get dressed later too.

Blair's aunt Sybil passed away (his Dad's sister), she was 91. I'm >so< glad Daniel and I visited with her before we left California - we had a nice lunch and went mini golfing. We're going to visit his parents this weekend. I've adored Sybil ever since I first met her after we got engaged. She offered to throw a shower for me (and invite his parents' friends) and it was lovely. She also adored my husband which was a very large point in her favor. :-)

Dan never told us what he wanted for Christmas, so we went ahead and got a few things for him. He's thinking of changing his look a little and so we got him a couple of henley shirts and a vest (he saw a guy on TV wearing that and liked it). I finished up my shopping tonight on Amazon - I was even able to buy itunes gift cards there! Little teachers' gifts and something for the boys to give Blair.

Dan's almost caught up with the English work. His teacher has been so understanding and willing to work with him. He was missing a couple of assignments - he'd had trouble understanding what to do and was too shy or afraid to ask her.

Blair was really down on himself after he lost his job, and his usual sunny personality is returning. I'm glad to have my usual hubby back.

Sister Study

When I received the diagnosis, it made me glad I'm participating in the Sister Study. They took dust samples from my house, tons of blood (they did the genetic test but didn't tell me the results), and a pretty thorough family history when I enrolled. I figure my sis and I probably have some genetic thing they haven't discovered yet. I hope my stuff helps them.

Then again it could be environmental. The house we lived in from 3rd grade until I was in college was built on a former apple orchard - pesticides maybe?

Radiation Update

The fatigue is no worse than before I started the radiation, when it was stress that was tiring me out. The last couple of nights I've slept poorly (and I had to wake up early to go to the Survivor's Breakfast yesterday morning).

I've been having my "packing dreams" again. The set up varies but there's always a bunch of stuff that needs to be packed, cleaned up, organized or otherwise dealt with, and whenever I think I'm done, I turn around and there's more stuff. Last night I was packing up my belongings at the end of a cruise and apparently I had rooms all over the ship (for which I was having trouble finding the keys.)

Yesterday afternoon was the second day in a row that I went into Daniel's room to check on his homework progress and he was asleep. Later I checked on him again and he got weepy, telling me that he was feeling overwhelmed. I asked if he was depressed and he said probably. I asked if he wanted to talk to someone (and I'm meeting with the gal who arranges services at the cancer center about meeting with a therapist myself), he said he wanted to. He's got a lot of stressors right now, with the change from his cozy magnet school, and the upheaval from changing schools and then changing some classes, plus my illness under it all. Even though on an intellectual level, we all believe I'll be fine, our subconciouses are probably sitting in a corner trembling and crying.

Coming down the hall to hang with us in the family room while he worked helped. He spoke with the teacher today at lunchtime, he's OK to finish the spark notes tonight and meet with the teacher tomorrow at lunch with his questions about the essay, and then he'll have the weeked to finish it. He came home in a really good mood and feels more in control of his schoolwork.

The yoga teacher knew something was off with me today, and pretty soon it was all pouring out of me. You know, if something happens to me, Blair will be OK, he's a grown up and he can take care of himself - but I worry about my boys. They both love me so much.  And Alex doesn't have a father he can turn to - he and Blair care for each other, but it's not the same as having had a father who's been involved his whole life. My poor babies.

Silly Dog

Dumbledore is growling and grousing and complaining because there's another dog on the TV. But the TV is off - it's his own reflection.

The nerve, the utter unmitigated gall of that other dog...

Indignity

I've decided that we have to go to Mardi Gras in New Orleans this year, because I can now take my top off in front of anyone without flinching.

Loooooving My Nook

I'm really enjoying my nook. Whenever I'm reading, Blair looks over and sarcastically apologizes for getting me such a sucky present. It's actually in his top 3 or 4 - with the Star Trek lunch box and the BE-MEUP license plate. I get pleasure out of it every day.

One of my favorite authors came out with a new book and I >had< to read it in paper form (it's a keeper) - that was weird!

I just found out that Analog and Asimov's magazines are offered by subscription to the nook (and the kindle). I let my subscriptions lapse several years ago - but I'm thinking about them again; so many of the award winning short SF stories get published in those 2 magazines.

Today was a nice day. 


We took Dumble to the vet (he got shots, but he needs steroids for skin inflammation and to have his teeth cleaned and some removed. Maybe they have a payment plan for the teeth cleaning?) 


I had my yoga class at the hospital from 10 to 11 or so (there's chatting afterwards), then I went to my local salon and had a mani-pedi (shimmery dark red - ooh la la) and an eyebrow wax. 


Then there was a presentation back at the hospital (called Look Good ... Feel Better) where I got a goody bag of makeup and stuff and a cookie. 


Then I ran downstairs for my 2pm radiation treatment and was able to move my appointment for the Friday after Thanksgiving to right after yoga so I don't have to make 2 trips to the hospital. 


And now I'm home with all my guys and my puppy.

Today was my second day of radiation and tonight was the BC support group. The gals at the group were very emphatic that I should be slathering on the lotion I was given samples of, especially since I am fair.

Yesterday afternoon, Blair and I were puttering around the house and I started to feel shaky and emotional. It was weird because my conscious mind was not nervous at all. Afterwards I calmed down but felt pretty wrung out. (I fell pretty wrung out most of the time actually).

After my treatment, I chatted a moment with the lady whose appointment is after mine (we recognized each other from yesterday.) She said even when things are going well, and the outlook is good, it will hit you what you're dealing with.

There's job I could have if I were willing to relocate to Chicago right now (assuming I could pass the security clearance). With Blair losing his job, I felt really pressured to take it. I'd been stewing about it for a couple of days, and Blair and I were sitting on the couch together (me computering and he reading), and I started sobbing. I can't go through it again. It was hard enough the first two times (and I had my aunt for the last one). I need my family and they need me. 

Yesterday, Daniel sat next to me for a bit, leaning against my shoulder as we played Bookworm on my ipod together. He told me he was so happy I was home, and I kissed the top of his head. Even if I wasn't sick I don't think I could do it, it sucks the life and energy right out of me and I have nothing to give to my job.

Freshman Forum on Underage Drinking

There was a required meeting at school this evening. Half the kids in the auditorium and half in the gymnasium, and the speakers were going back and forth to speak in both venues. There was a doctor to speak about the physical effects of binge drinking (liver damage, accidents, etc), a cop talking about having to tell parents their kids were dead, a man who had killed his stepbrother while driving drunk, and a mom who had lost her son. The cop also talked about an anonymous tip line (to report parties with alcohol) and calling your folks when you find yourself in a situation and need to get out (and telling the parents not to punish the kid if he calls in that situation).

I went in thinking it would be lame, but it was very affecting. Daniel thought it was a good presentation as well, and we had a nice talk afterward. They've been doing this for 5 years now and they've been surveying the kids about drinking and supposedly these lectures have had a positive effect.

Radiation

My radiation starts next Monday - every day for 6.5 weeks. I'm to expect fatigue and possible redness and or swelling.

It's 3.7 miles and takes about 10 minutes to get there. :-)

This is the same hospital Daniel was born in and my grandmother was a volunteer there for many years and was once their volunteer of the year.

It's a really nice place - the cancer center is very restful and reassuring 

And it turns out that my brother has participated in the Swim Across The Sound (from Port Jefferson on Long Island to Bridgeport) and has swum the whole way a couple of times. The Swim is what paid for the SWIM Center and pays for a lot of the services for patients (like the classes and massages).

Good News

I got a call from the oncologist. The oncotype test came back with a very low score for recurrence (8 out of 100). This means there's no need for chemo. Next step is to see him to work out a treatment plan, and get started with radiation.


The additional scan was a bone density scan, for a base line so they can keep track of the density as I take tamoxifen or whatever for the next several years.

Support

There's so much cool support type stuff for breast cancer patients at my hospital. I've been to 2 (very gentle) yoga classes so far, and today I went to a session about post-operative stuff and afterwards to a support group that meets twice a month. The yoga teacher told me about free massage therapy and I'm waiting for the callback from the gal who's setting me up.

The ladies at the support group were lovely.

Oncologist

This morning, a friend stopped by with yummy donuts and muffins and we had a nice chat. She even got to meet my Mom who came to pick me up to take me to the oncologist (Blair met us there, his work is across the street from the hospital). It was wonderful to see my friend and she looks terrific.

I'm still pretty sore from the surgery and plenty bruised up too. I had a bad reaction to the tape and have blisters around the edges of where it was. I now have something to remember when I'm asked about allergies to medications, etc (tegaderm?).

We had a long talk with the doctor - I really liked his manner and personality. He gave us a little biology lesson about cancer and breast cancer in particular, and what they know so far about mine. Unfortunately, they don't have the pathology report from the lumpectomy yet, so there isn't a concrete plan yet. There will definitely be radiation, most probably tamoxifen for several years after my treatment is complete, and there's about it seemed a 40% chance that he will recommend chemo as well. He explained everything very clearly but not at all in a condescending way. I feel really comfortable with him. His office is contacting my surgeon about getting the reports from the lumpectomy when they are available, and there is a test he wants performed on the tumor, if Dr Ward hasn't already ordered it. So it may be a couple of weeks more until we have all the information we need to make a plan going forward.

Mom and I went to lunch afterwards and it was nice to chat (although it was more like verbal diarrhea on my part and listening on hers - thanks Mom!) Now I'm back home with my puppy sleeping by my feet, and I need to call the surgeon and see if I'm allowed to drive and if it's OK to go to the yoga class at the cancer center tomorrow.

Surgery

We were at the hospital from 8:00 till after 5:00. They feel they were able to get good margins when they removed the cancer but won't know until they get the pathologist report on Thursday.

Yoga at the Swim Center

This morning I made it to the free yoga class at the hospital. It was lovely and the teacher (and the other participants) was really nice and sweet. At the end, she recited something while we all tried to meditate, and I felt a little teary. Another gal started to cry (it turned out she'd had to put her dog to sleep last night). I went over to tell her I'd started to cry to (so she wouldn't feel weird) and she told me about her dog, and the next thing I know I'm rubbing her arms and giving her hugs. I felt so badly for her loss.

Another lady, with sparse white hair, was looking at these cute little knitted caps the teacher had (kind of a flapper style with a big knitted flower) and admiring a tan one. When she asked how much they were (she wanted something warmer than a ball cap for the winter) the teacher told her folks at her church had knitted them and they were free. By this time, there's just me, the teacher, the crying lady and her husband, and the hat lady. The teacher was asking about the surgery, and saying she'd be thinking of me, and then offered me a shawl that was also knit by ladies from her church. It's a cream tweedy yarn with earthy shades of pink and lavender (it's really lovely), and it came with a poem. She put it over my shoulders and had the other ladies touch my back while I closed my eyes and she read the poem. I got a little teary again, but it was very sweet. Then they all wished me luck, and reassured me I'd be calmer once I had the surgery and the results and a plan.

Afterward, I went to the mall, picked up prescriptions at Target, had lunch and picked up a couple of CDs and a new pair of cozy PJs. Then I went to a nail salon and had a mani-pedi and a little massage. I feel quite a bit calmer than I did this morning. We're going to have to get up pretty early tomorrow to get to Greenwich by 8. The xanax helped last night, I had a good night - hopefully I'll sleep tonight as well.

Dumbledore is much better, he's off the meds and back to his old self, frisky and silly. He was savaging a rubber chicken this morning. (I love when he has something in his mouth and whips his head back and forth - he's such a nut). He's also been extra cuddly lately.

Freak Out

So I burned my hand on the oven rack last night (no more pain by this AM, but a small blister, so nothing major) and the next thing I know I'm having a full blown freak out, crying and shaking, right before Blair had to leave for chorus rehearsal. I think I'm most worried about the financial situation - and it's not completely dire, at worst we'd have to put most of our stuff in storage and rent until we figure out where we're going next, which we could swing on Blair's salary and my unemployment. But it felt last night like I was poised at the edge of a deep dark hole.

Blair comforted me and I knew I could have asked him to stay home, but this is his one leisure activity and he needs a break (and it felt nice knowing I could ask him.) By the time he got home, I felt better - I think it helped to let off some steam.

This morning I had a chat with the hospital. I had thought they were billing me because they didn't have the correct insurance info for September. Turns out all the bills were for events in August and they'd already been submitted to the correct insurance, so they were for our share of the bills. Ugh.

I had to run down to Greenwich this afternoon to drop off my films with my surgeon. (It took about an hour each way with traffic). They gave me the lowdown on where and when, and when to stop eating, etc. The upcoming surgery is getting more real.

I had lunch with a friend this afternoon - we ended up chatting for like 2 and a half hours. That was really nice.

I have to be at the hospital at 8AM on Friday for the thing with the dye to find the sentinel nodes. Then I get to wait around until noon or so for the actual surgery, and we'll be going home right afterward. I asked if I could take a xanax that morning, but she said no, but that they'll give me some sort of sedative before the thing with the dye (that's actually bothering me more than the surgery). The whole idea icks me out.

She offered to schedule me tomorrow for the dye thing, but I wanted Blair to be there with me without having to take the time off, so that's why everything is getting done on Friday.

After spending yesterday in my pajamas, and napping a lot, I was out most of the day (between lunch and the drive to Greenwich) so there was no napping today. I was thinking of taking a xanax at bedtime tonight (and tomorrow night too) so I can hopefully sleep well and avoid napping tomorrow. There's a yoga class at the hospital at 10 tomorrow that I want to go to - I've got to stop vegetating on my couch all day.

Susan G Komen 3 Day for the Cure

A friend will be participating in the 3 Day for the Cure event.  She's done this every year for several years.

http://www.the3day.org/site/TR/2010/WashingtonDCEvent2010?px=2261964&pg=personal&fr_id=1474

Sloane

Today's appointment didn't effect me the same way. The doctor at Sloane was less warm than the doc in Greenwich (she even rolled her eyes at one point). But, there were a few things that I hadn't heard before (or that hadn't really penetrated) so it was worth it from that point of view.


We're going to keep the surgery appointment with the doctor in Greenwich. So I'm having a lumpectomy on October 8th. Depending on whether or not there's lymph node involvement and the pathology results (either or both), I will need chemo.


What did sock me in the gut this afternoon was making the appointment with the oncologist for the following Wednesday (the pathology results should be back by then).

I had a lovely insurance scare the other day. The Greenwich doctor's office called to tell me that the insurance wouldn't cover the visit. I called Aetna, and they told me that my coverage was terminated on September 1st and that I should contact my erstwhile employer to see why. (Back in August, we had paid COBRA enough to cover us until his insurance kicks in on October 1st.) I was totally panicking as I called my HR contact. Turns out my former employer switched carriers as of 9/1 and they missed me somehow when the new cards got issued and packets were sent out. She assured me she would take care of it and that my coverage would be retroactive to 9/1. She should have a policy number tomorrow, and I can call various providers and have them resubmit to the new company. I had also received an $1100 bill from the hospital, so it's a real relief to find out why.


I had to give Sloane the wrong insurance info this morning (since I don't have the new info yet), and I'll have to call them too with the new info when I get it.

Update

We really liked the surgeon we met on Friday (in Greenwich). She was very warm and nice and has an amazing reputation. We made an appointment with her for the surgery for the 8th of October. Tomorrow, we see the surgeon at Sloan Kettering.

Yesterday was a bad day. I'm usually floating on de Nile, but I really couldn't after the appointment. I felt shaky and weepy all day. Just going to the grocery store left me exhausted. It seems better this morning.

Second Opinions

Today we're going to Greenwich to talk to a surgeon recommended by a friend of Blair's who's an OR nurse at the same hospital for a second opinion. On Monday we're seeing a doctor at Sloan Kettering that was recommended by my brother's MIL (who had BC).

After we get our second opinions, I'll probably schedule the lumpectomy with the doctor here in Bridgeport. If the margins and lymph nodes are clear, I'll have 7 weeks of radiation followed by hormone therapy for several years, but there will probably be no need for chemo (there's a test that will be done on the tumor after the surgery). If the margins aren't clear they'll have to go back in and take a larger area; and if the first lymph nodes they take are effected, they will take more lymph nodes - and I will need more aggressive therapy (ie chemo).

School Agita

We thought we were so clever.  We spent a lot of time deciding where to send Daniel to High School after he finished up with the magnet school he'd been attending since pre-school, finally deciding on the IB program at Harding High in Bridgeport.  We used CT's Project Choice program which is usually used by kids in cities like Bridgeport to attend suburban schools like Trumbull's - we were the first family in the state (we think) to use it to go in the opposite direction - because we felt the program would be rigorous and challenging to Daniel.



I got a phone call on Wednesday from Daniel's Math and English teachers. They were both concerned for him because they only have 15 freshmen in the IB program and they mixed them in with regular students instead of being sequestered into their own classes (9th and 10th grade are "pre-IB", so I guess they don't start an actual IB curriculum until 11th grade). Both teachers thought this mixed class wasn't going to serve Daniel well, that he'd be bored since the teacher would have to slow down for the less academically oriented students.


We had a family meeting and decided to pull Daniel from the IB program and enroll him in Trumbull High. We took him over first thing this morning and met with his guidance counselor. Dan took a math assessment while we ran over to his old school to pick up his records. When we got back Dan was ranking possible elective classes in order of his interest. Rather than stick him in any old class for today, he's going to start on Monday and the counselor will take care of getting him into the right classes for him (probably all honors, and honors classes need the buy-in of the department heads, so that will keep the counselor busy today). The three of us are back home, getting ready to go out to lunch.

Poor Dumbledore!

Dumbledore's been sleeping poorly the last couple of nights. Sunday night, he just could not settle down.  He'd lie down, then get right back up and made a lot of little noises - drove us crazy.  I didn't have a lot of patience for him during the night, but after some sleep I realized that there was probably something wrong with him.  He's also been hanging out on the floor a lot instead of hopping up by us.  I decided to wait another day to take him to the vet (since I'd rather take him to his regular vet today than the emergency vet on Labor Day).  Last night was a little better but not by much.


He's got some pain in/near his spine in the area of his rib cage.  She prescribed an NSAID, and rest.  No rough play, gentle exercise (like walkies), help him up and down from furniture as mush as possible and hold him parallel to the floor (no lifting him under the armpits like a baby).  I have to give the medicine with food, so I stopped at the pet store and got some canned food (he usually eats only kibble and I wanted to get something he'd be sure to eat when I gave it to him).  He wouldn't drink the medicine from the dropper like my aunt's dog does, but I mixed it in the wet food and he scarfed it up.  I went shopping for a bit and he seems a little better already.


He's supposed to take it easy for about 6 weeks.  Poor baby!


(Update from the next morning - he slept all night and seems much better already!)

Biopsy #3

Biopsy #3 is negative.  Whew.



So it's "just" one spot of the most common kind of breast cancer.  Next up is a lumpectomy and sentinel node biopsy.  The pathology results from those procedures will determine the course of treatment.


I'm terribly relieved.  If I had cancer in more than one spot (especially in both breasts), I was seriously considering a double mastectomy even with the clean genetic testing.


Biopsy #2 was an intra-mammary (?) lymph node (I guess they aren't usually there?), and #3 was fibro-cystic tissue.  I'm glad they've been so meticulous, but it was scary thinking I could have cancer in three places.

Today's Biopsy

I should have results on Tuesday.

Finally Some Good News

Genetic testing - normal.  2nd biopsy - just a normal lymph node.  


One more biopsy tomorrow.

OK, So I'm Not as Calm as I Thought

Blair came home today with the info on the health plans that will be available to him October 1st (we're on COBRA now).  He went to ask HR about including Alex when he signs up but it opened up a little can of worms.  He'd originally planned to go with the least expensive option, but with my diagnosis, that would end up costing us a bundle.  But the next option is so much more expensive, that Blair was talking about needing to go into his 401K to make ends meet.  For some reason that hit me right in the gut and I was terrified.


We've lost so much already (closing the store, declaring bankruptcy).  We'll only be able to stay in the house as long as the lawyer can hold off the banks.  I don't have a job; I don't have the intestinal fortitude to work full time in another state and undergo treatment away from my family; and my income earning potential is small here in CT.  And Blair's 401k isn't bottomless.  And it occurred to me the other day that I can't put off a will any longer - and I need to think about advanced directives (ulp).


A group of friends were talking about what kinds of invalids we are.  I tend to keep going to work when I'm sick until I can't take it any more (probably too long).  But when I finally allow myself to take off, I like to get set up on the couch with all the remotes and phones close to hand, cuddly blankets and comfort food, books and the dog.  I tend to feel sorry for myself, and I'm a bit of a whiner sometimes.  Most of all, I hate hate hate throwing up.  It's absolutely the worst.  I'm really afraid of chemo in that respect.


And my surgeon just called and they want to do an MRI guided biopsy on the left on Friday

Today's Appointment

One of the doctors is unavailable today (I'm thinking it's the radiologist), so rather than having the scan today and having to come back for any biopsies, my appointment was rescheduled to tomorrow morning.  I'm a little relieved.  I wasn't looking forward to the pain afterward.  Parts of me look like an eggplant.

Wanna Hear Something Weird?

I've been waking up happy.


I didn't sleep at all the night of the biopsy because I'd been doped up and slept all day, and I was up a couple of hours the next night, but since then I've been sleeping like a log and waking up in a good mood. At first I thought I was in shock and things hadn't sunk in, but that should have worn off by now.


I think it's waking up next to Blair every morning and knowing the boys are both just down the hall, that's making me so happy. Waking up knowing I fell right asleep and didn't notice waking up again is also happy-making.



We did Dan's back to school shopping yesterday, Daniel got size 9 1/2 shoes for heaven's sake! He also got a fedora and he's totally rocking it, especially when he's got his sunglasses on. He now has enough snarky t-shirts to last a whole week.


I'm enjoying the nook. Blair and I picked it up Friday and I returned the books I had bought earlier in the week and re-bought them electronically. I added a bunch of free books and a couple of others I've been wanting, and then added something to my wish list.


We were headed to Target yesterday when we passed Borders. I had been looking for a cancer cookbook (I've started eating healthier and picked up a veggie steamer for the microwave) and they didn't have any in stock at B&N. While I was tying to decide between the two, I used the 3G to check if either of them was available for the nook. They weren't but it was so cool to be able to check. There was another interesting book that I added to the wishlist.(I'm liking that feature! I can keep track of interesting books without actually having to buy them at the time - it was kind of a little revelation to me that I didn't have to spend a lot of money on books right this minute because they might no be available when I get around to them.)


Dan was all excited to find out that there was supposed to be a Hunger Games event starting in a few minutes, so we hung around.  Nothing happened so Dan asked.  Turns out that they didn't start because they didn't think anyone was interested, so they made an announcement and held it just for Dan! He and two employees had a discussion. He bought the next two books and got an autograph and bookmark for participating.



Alex is off work at 3:30 so I'll be able to have birthday dinner with all my guys on my actual birthday! And it's never ending pasta bowl time at Olive Garden.

I Need More Tests

I had my MRI this morning. I had a couple of Xanax beforehand so there was no anxiety and I kinda zoned out at one point. I was most afraid of the contrast dye, worried about it burning or making me ill, but the tech reassured me. It just felt kinda cold when in went in. The noise wasn't that bad either, and they gave me earplugs.

Afterwards, B and I had Thai for lunch, then went up to Barnes and Noble for a nook for my birthday. We're thinking that if I need chemo, I'll be doing a lot of sitting around, and an eBook would be easier to tote around than multiple books.  We went for the 4G model because I can shop for and buy books wherever I'm at (including the hospital.)  It's charging now - whoo hoo. I returned some books that I bought last week, so I can get them on the nook instead.

While we were at the checkout at Staples I got a call from my doctor. She said the radiologist looking at the MRI saw something in a different part of the right breast and another something in the left that they want to take closer looks at. I have an appointment Monday at 1:15 to have some ultrasound and mammographic scans, and may have biopsies too. 


I'm not thrilled that there may be more than one in there.

Stupid Stupid Cat

It was positive.



I'm having the genetic testing tomorrow - it takes 7 business days to get the result. If I have the gene mutation, I should probably have a double mastectomy, otherwise something less invasive. Probably chemo either way, just a question of how much, depending on the genetic testing and a more detailed report from the biopsy (genetic results on the cancer itself).


I have an MRI scheduled for Friday morning. I could opt for a lumpectomy without waiting for the genetic results, but it seems a little silly to go through that when I might have to have more radical surgery anyway.

Opening the Box

Saw the surgeon this morning.  She wanted to do a mammographic guided biopsy at the hospital at 2pm.


It was more uncomfortable and more intrusive this time. I'm feeling a bit weepy and traumatized and violated right now (despite a couple of xanax before the procedure). Blair and Dan and Dumbledore are taking care of me with ice cream and tylenol and a puppy pedicure. (A puppy pedicure is having one's toes and feet licked by tiny puppy tongue. Luckily Dumbly doesn't slobber but has a nice dry little tongue. :-)  )


The surgeon should have the results tomorrow afternoon.

That Stupid Cat is Back in the Box

I went this morning for a 6 month follow up mammogram. It was just supposed to be an ultrasound, but I'm dense, so they took a bunch of films too. Then they took me to a little room with two comfy chairs in it. The radiologist explained it as dotting Is and crossing Ts, but that what they were seeing on the scans didn't mesh with the results of the biopsy and that I should see the surgeon again for another biopsy. I have an appointment for Monday morning.

The Rest of the Road Trip

The rest of the trip was moms, moms, moms!  I'm on an email list with moms of kids who were due in March of 1996.  We've been together close to 15 years now.  Saturday, we had lunch with a North Carolina mom, then stayed over with another.  Sunday was lunch with 2 North Carolina moms, then staying over with a Virginia mom.  Monday we were going to see the Air and Space museum in DC, but PetSmart couldn't board Dumble without a kennel cough vaccination, which he's never had.  So we had lunch in a restaurant with outdoor seating, then puttered around a bit before visiting a mom in Maryland for dinner, before heading over to another mom's for the night.  After a wonderful sticky bun breakfast, we headed to northwestern New Jersey for lunch with another mom before heading home.  It was wonderful to sleep in my very own bed last night, next to my very own husband.  My entire family - including Alex - was sleeping under the very same roof last night.  I am a very contented woman.

It's a Crazy Town Full of Neon Dreams

Yesterday was all driving.  From Lawrence, Kansas to Madisonville, KY (about 2 hours outside of Nashville.)  Today was a lot more fun.  We drove into Nashville and spent the day at the Country Music Hall of Fame, including a tour of the famous RCA Studio B where Elvis recorded for many years.  Dumble hung out in his backpack while we enjoyed the museum.  Then another 2 hours to Crossville, TN for the night.

Whoo Hoo!

This morning, we were up fairly early to hit the car audio place before it opened - I wanted to be first in line.  Less than 2 hours later, we left with functionign XM in the new car.  They even had a gizmo to connect the XM to the antenna rather than bradcasting an FM signal.  The sound is fabulous and less likely to get stepped on by local FM stations (nothing at all interfered today).  Then we stopped at Target for snacks and beverages and got some ice for the cooler.

Back to the dealer to pick up the plates from the old car - I had forgotten that we probably have to turn them back in in CT in order to get the car off the books.  On the way out of town, we got drive-through lunch.  It's now 1AM on Wednesday.  I think our GPS sent us a round-about route that added over an hour to our trip, but we're here.


Tomorrow, the plan is to visit the Boot Hill Museum and then "get outta Dodge" and head to a friend's in Lawrence.

Quietly Celebrating

I don't want to get too excited because we could still run into trouble tomorrow.

Today we picked up my new car.  It's a 2001 Toyota Sienna (see it here), and we got a really good deal on it.  Dan and I got up relatively early, ate breakfast at IHOP (Dan is loving the Minion-ade) and went to the dealer.  We finished asked them to give the car the once-over, checking fluids and belts and such to make sure it was OK for the drive to CT (we bought it wholesale, so that stuff hadn't been done yet.)  While they worked on it, Dan and I went to the bank to get a cashier's check for the balance.  After the car was officially mine, Dan got to bang a huge Chinese gong and everyone applauded.

Next up was to take the car to a car audio place to have the XM installed.  (I will not under any circumstances drove cross-country without my XM (and AC, but that's another story).  The car would not have been ready until 7, and I had other things to do, so I plan to show up first thing tomorrow morning and hopefully be out of there fairly early.  We have no stops to make, so as long as we make Dodge City by bedtime, I'll be happy; it could take until 2 and we'd still be OK.

Next up was the U-Haul place.  I need a trailer because the Sienna's interior volume is less than that of the Previa.  They had the trailer I'd reserved, but didn't have the right size thingy that holds the ball that goes into the square part of the hitch on the car.  Dan and I went across town to pick up the thingy and the ball.  We hit Sonic afterwards, then headed back to U-Haul.  The young man went to hitch up the trailer and found that there was no electrical hook up for the lights on the trailer, and it's illegal to tow a trailer without it.  The good news, he was able to install that and had the parts.  The other gentleman told me I was lucky the younger guy was there, because we wouldn't have been able to get it done at any of the U-Haul places (I guess the kid was the only one in the whole city working today that could do it?)

Dan and I climbed up on a pile of boxes to wait, me knitting and he reading his summer reading book, to wait.  Less than an hour later we were on our way back to the dealership with the trailer in tow.  My old car was in a service bay since it was incapable of being moved, and they drove my new car and trailer into the bay area so Dan and I could transfer my belongings.

We got most everything into the trailer, leaving the car for our day-to-day luggage, and double and triple checked to old car to make sure we had everything.  Even so, I almost left my garage door opener on the visor.  We're both hot and sticky, but it's done!  Dan cleaned up a bit and is going to jump in the pool for a bit.  I plan to shower and change into my jammies after his swim.  The audio place opens at 9, so we're going to leave here no later than 8.  I plan to be first on line.

Twisty

I might be getting a new (to me) car instead.

A Light at the End of the Tunnel

The service managers at the two dealerships worked it out, and agree that the AC compressor seizing up is what killed the drive shaft, and that the compressor going was just bad luck. I told the guy here to order the drive shaft and do the repairs, which I'm on my own in paying for.  I wonder if I can get the CA guy to pay for my hotel for dicking around for so long...

The drive shaft won't be here til Tuesday so maybe we can be on the road again by Wednesday?  We've pretty much exhausted the entertainment possibilities of Albuquerque.  A balloon ride is too expensive, it's too hot to go to a ball game.  We'll hit the natural history and science museum at least.


In the meantime, Daniel is excellent company and it's nice to spend great gobs of time with him after being separated so long while I was in CA.  Alex has moved home, and I'm really looking forward to spending time with him too.

Wrong Turn at Albuquerque

I've been waiting for the CA guy to get back to the NM guy, and I finally spoke to the CA gut this afternoon and left a message for the NM guy and he hasn't gotten back to me.  CA guy's story is that he and NM guy agree that it was the death of the compressor that caused the drive shaft to fail, not the nuts being british measurements instead of metric.  The death of the compressor had nothing to do with the two kinds of refrigerant (and my BIL the mechanic agrees).  I want to hear from the NM guy that it's not the CA guys fault and I need to tell him to go ahead and order the drive shaft.  Since that will take at least overnight, I don't see us leaving before Monday. 

We got a rental from the NM dealer and have been getting out of the hotel at least.  We went to the top of Sandia Peak yesterday, and had lunch up there.  After wards we drove along route 66, then we saw the Sorcerer's Apprentice (loved it!) and we're going to see the Karate Kid later.  We blowled two rounds earlier today (and we both did pretty badly, me worse than Dan).  Tomorrow we are signed up for a segway tour of the older part of Albuquerque.  The hotel is nice and the room comfortable.  So things could be worse.

It Gets Better

They think the compressor blew because there were two types of refrigerant in it.  Since I had the system upgraded from freon in CT before I left for CA, and had it serviced in CA before I left (the replaced some o-rings and topped off the refrigerant) that means the 2nd type was added by the guys in CA.

There has been a rattling noise from the bushings in (on? around?) the drive shaft for a long time, but when I had it looked at I was told it was just cosmetic and not causing any problems with the car.  When I had the car checked in CA, they told me that it had passed that point and was now causing wear.  They found me a reconditioned drive shaft for about a third the cost of a new one, and I had them replace it. 

The guy taking care of me here in NM called this morning.  The drive shaft tore itself apart (could that have been the thump I heard?) because it was attached with american size bolts and not metric.  A new one can't be here until tomorrow.


I called the guy who handled my car in CA and he's going to get back to me after he talks to his manager.

Still Waiting

They hope to have the car fixed by tomorrow afternoon.  It needs a new compressor and they can't check the rest of the electrical system until they get that in.  I had a good long nap this afternoon, but I'm ready for bed now.

Is It Hot Out Here, Or Is It Just Me?

On Friday, Dan and I packed up the car, with a break to run out to buy one of these, and a mat that you fill with water for your dog to lay on that helps keep him cool.  I was worried about driving in AZ and keeping the dog cool (and I was right to as you will see).  We also hit the movie theater to see a matinee of Despicable Me and for Dan to use the rest of his tokens for the arcade.  Despicable Me was fantastic and I heartily recommend it to anyone.

By the time we finished packing the car up it was 11:30.  We had a lot of trouble getting this attached to the car, so I stopped by the Toyota dealer to ask them to take a look at the straps and make sure they were tight enough.  After that we filled up the car and bought ice for the cooler and headed out of town. 

A couple of hours into the trip, though, things started to go wrong.  First the AC started blowing hot, then it would blow cool for a bit, then hot again.  Then the fan stopped working.  We saw a shopping center from the highway that had a PetSmart and a WalMart, so we got off the highway hoping to get some ice and have someone look at the fuses.  I dropped Dan and the dog at the pet store to take advantage of their AC.

Miles away, at the other end of the shopping center, the guy at WalMart's tire and lube center couldn't help me with fuses, but let me know of a couple of options nearby, I got a bags of ice however, and headed back across the center to Auto Zone.  A very nice man there figured out where my fuses were and sure enough, the one for the AC was blown.  He sold me a couple of fuses and popped one in and I went back to get Dan and the dog.  I blew and replaced the fuse again - at some point in this saga, and having gone through nearly a half dozen fuses, I finally realized I could have the AC button pushed in, or the fan on, but not both at the same time.  Dan dumped the ice in the cooler, and we used the water spritzer-fan thingy he got at Universal to keep ourselves and the dog cool (coolish? warmish? not hottish?).  He had a cut-down paper cup in the cup holder in front of him and he was drinking regularly, and every time he started to pant, Dan would spritz him with water.  We arrived at my friend Betsey's house outside Phoenix, hot, drained, wrung out and tired, but alive.

Bets and I have been members of a mom's email list since our kids were babies (she since before her kid was born), we've never met in person before, but we did not feel like strangers, but good friends.  Dan was nervous about spending time with a family he didn't know, but the 5 of them were soon getting along famously.  We lazed about with them on Sunday morning until noon, and Dan didn't want to leave, but we had to reach Albuquerque at a reasonable time to get a good night's sleep.  Plus Sunday was 7/11 and we wanted to find a 7-11 in Albuquerque for free slushies (they give them away every year and it's a thing with us.)   Well, people make plans and fate laughs its tush off, right?

I had hoped that having a chance to cool off (HAH - it was over a hundred when we left, so the car was probably not any cooler than it had been when we turned it off) would give us back the AC.  No dice, and I blew the second (and final) fuse I had picked up at Auto Zone.  As we buzzed along the highway, windows down, using the spritzer (Dan filled it with ice water before we left, smart fellow), we passed a Toyota dealer.  We pulled off the next exit, used the GPS to find our way back to the dealer.  And realized it was Sunday.

I did find a gas station with ice and fuses and filled up the car.  We put most of one bag of ice in the cooler, with the last couple of handfuls of ice left in the bag, which we put next to the dog.  Dan kept an eye on him, dropping the occasional ice cube in his water.  He seemed comfortable enough - no panting.  Dan kept the second bag of ice, sometimes on his lap, sometimes beside him, passing it to me for the occasional hug.  He gave me cubes to suck on too, and kept adding cubes to the spritzer and passing it to me when I needed it.  We popped in a fuse and ran the fan with no AC and pretended that the KoolerAire was helping.

Around three we saw that there were clouds ahead and areas that were in the shade of those clouds.  We were so glad to see that we would be in the shade of those clouds soon and it did get a little cooler.  We stopped at a McDonalds, so everyone could potty.  I snuck Dumble in and stood by the door with him, but he was shivering in the AC from being damp from the condensation from his ice bag.  McD's sold us lunch and more ice, and I ended up wearing the last of Daniel's first bag of ice on my head (so hot at this point that I cared not how I looked).  Icy water leaked from the bag onto my neck and back - heaven!  As we drove higher, headed towards New Mexico, it got cooler, and we passed through some showers even. 

Around 7 or 8, we commenced the great bathroom search, as three consecutive exits had only establishments that were closed or out of business.  We finally hit a dingy truckstop and grabbed some snacks, as the dubious restaurant had already closed.  We continued on in the dark.

There was a loud thunk and the battery light on the dash went on.  I don't think I hit anything - there was no bump.  I called Blair, it was after 11 his time, and he was starting a new job the next day, but I didn't know what else to do.  Dan searched through the car's manual - but the description of what causes that light was no help.  Was it a pull over right this minute and get it looked at light, or a finish driving to our destination and get it looked at in the morning light?

Blair was googling like crazy and found a question on line asking about the light in a 1991 Previa (mine is a 93) - I was amazed at his search engine prowess!  Blair the might internet hunter.  From the answer, we decided that as long as I didn't turn the car off, I was probably OK to continue towards Albuquerque.  I saw "towards" rather than "to" because we were not fortunate enough to get there under our own power.  Blair also looked up the addresses and opening times of the two Toyota dealers in ABQ, and my plan was to take the car there first thing in the morning.

We'd slowed down considerably while talking to Blair, and instead of arriving in Albuquerque before midnight as we'd been on track to, it was now nearly 11 and ABQ was about an hour away.  I saw that there was a McDonalds at the next exit, and decided that we'd be OK to go through the drive through.  As we turned at the bottom of the ramp, I realized I had no power steering.  Who knows when it went though, since I'd been driving arrow straight roads at highway speeds for the last several hours.  But as we turned on to the ramp to get back on the highway, the ABS light came on.  Further down the ramp, I realized the headlights were out, and that the car wasn't responding to the gas pedal.  I continued off the ramp on to the shoulder and puttered along there for a bit before drifting to a stop.

It was now a bit after 11 mountain time.  There was nothing Blair could do, so I didn't call him.  AAA promised a tow truck by 20 after 12.  By shutting off everything in the car, we got the blinkers to work.  About 45 minutes later, they were quite dim, and I lit my only flare (good for about 15 minutes of light.)  When that died, I put the blinkers on again, but they didn't last long.  Another call to AAA, to find that they had gotten my phone number wrong and the tow driver was trying to get a hold of us.  I explained my worry about being invisible, and the operator offered to call the local cops to come, but as we were talking about it the tow truck driver arrived.  He'd been told to meet us behind the McDonalds, not on the highway beyond it.  He got the car loaded on to the flatbed and we started off.

A one hour plus drive to the dealership later, followed by a comedy of errors involving the car locking itself, or maybe the tow truck driver hit the lock button on my key fob (but thank goodness the side door needs to be locked manually sometimes), us unloading our overnight bags and puppy necessities so Daniel could scramble up front to unlock the doors and retrieve the keys, and the trailer hitch hanging up on the pavement with the car half off the flatbed (first he tried to slide the flatbed out from under my car, then he pulled it back up on the bed and moved to a part of the parking lot with a bit of a slope, there with much manhandling he managed to unload the car.)  I called a taxi when we arrived, so the cab driver saw part of this floor show.  By the time Daniel and I got to our hotel, checked in and got into bed it was 3:30.  I left a wake up call for 5:30 so I'd have the time to call for another cab, take a shower and get to the dealer a half hour before they opened at 7, so I'd be early in their queue.

I left Daniel and Dumbledore sleeping and went to the dealer.  I'd told him the night before what my plan was and told him if he woke up before I got back to walk the dog and eat free breakfast.  I got to the dealership, checked in and explained the history, then walked across the street to BK for breakfast.  Back to the dealer where GMA was playing in the waiting room.  I'm glad they caught that barefoot bandit kid before he managed to get himself killed, and wondered how on earth he became a folk hero?  Because he's white and cute?  He's an amoral thief for heaven's sake.  I actually exclaimed out loud when I heard that Switzerland won't extradite a man who drugged, raped and sodomized a child (someone younger than my Daniel is now).  WTF?  White and cute (talented?) again?  And speaking of white, cute and talented - how big a loser is Mel Gibson?

But I digress.  The AC compressor is gone.  There's a mixture of two refrigerants in my AC system.  (I got my AC upgraded from freon before I left CT, and serviced in CA, could the CA guys have used a different one from the CT guys?  Did that cause my problems with the AC?)  They need to get a part (parts?) which will be here around 2.  They hope to get me fixed today.  I extended my hotel reservation (which reminds me, I need to move tonight's reservation in Dodge City, KS to tomorrow night, and I need to revise the rest of my itinerary).  The dealership gave me a ride back to the hotel, where dog and boy still sleep (at quarter to 10), and they'll fetch me back later.

I think I'll take a nap now.

Dan and Ellen in California

Sunday night we saw Toy Story 3 and really enjoyed it.  It was sweet and funny and exciting.  Last night we saw the Last Airbender, we used to watch the cartoon series together and though the movie started out slowly (there was a lot of set-up to get through) by the end it was quite good.  I hope they manage to make the whole series. 

Today we are driving up to meet Blair’s aunt for lunch.  After that, mini golf at a place near here that looks way fun.  My van is in for pre-cross-country-trip servicing and while they have it, they lent me a Prius.  Dan is thrilled.  I had trouble figuring out how to disengage the parking brake.

Tonight, we are probably going back to the movies because Dan has a pocketful of tokens for the arcade at the theater.

the good news is I got to california ...

In the past, I've been very happy with Jet Blue, but I was trapped in flight cancellation hell for 47 hours.

It was supposed to be a simple 6 hour flight direct from JFK to Long Beach, CA.  Dumbledore and I have done it a half dozen times.  Leave the house in CT at 2pm, get to JFK around 4-ish, board the 6pm flight and arrive in CA around 9, up the next morning to go to work.  It's been very convenient for my purposes, and has worked well.


Until Sunday night.  We arrived at JFK a bit after 4 despite heavier traffic than usual, Blair driving, Daniel along for company.  (There's another story in how long it took them to get back to CT, but that's for another time).  I stop at a monitor and receive a nasty surprise - my flight was canceled.  We got on the check in line which is longer than usual with people who would normally have been in the bag drop line.

At the end of my wait, I am helped by a lovely young man (who will turn out to not have been so lovely after all, as we shall soon see), who put me on standby for the 8am direct flight to Long Beach, and booked me on the 3pm flight which stops in Salt Lake City.  We inquire about a hotel voucher - the passenger bill of rights, that Jet Blue is a signatory to, states that if the cancellation is their fault (so weather doesn't count, and we were told it was a maintenance issue) and they give less than 4 hours' notice (and the email I have was sent after 4pm, so less than 2 hours' notice), they have to put passengers up in a hotel.  Lovely young man says we need to speak with a supervisor, and he has sent for one.  We stand aside with a woman and her daughter who would also like a voucher.

This is when it starts to get ugly.  When the supervisor arrives, he first tells us there are no rooms.  No rooms? are the hotels full?, my new friend asks.  No, he clarifies, there are no vouchers.  You've run out?  No, he reluctantly says, there won't be any.  Thus follows a long heated discussion that touches on the length of time it can take some text messages to be delivered (3 hours?), the passengers' bill of rights and Jet Blue's participation therein, and a spurious claim that the flight was canceled at 1pm rather than 4 (I hadn't yet checked my email at that point but this guy was speaking out of his ... rear.  Later we overheard him telling other passengers that the cancellation was weather related, I'm assuming that he was trying to avoid other heated lengthy discussions) and the rather unbelievable claim that he was the highest ranking employee in the entire terminal and yet didn't have the authority to issue vouchers.

Finally, we decamped, after my new friend and I exchanged phone numbers.   Blair, Daniel, Dumbledore and I went downstairs to hunt down a hotel room for me, given that I would have to get back to the airport early, and that Blair had to work in the morning and wouldn't be able to drive me in.  I found a hotel that would take Dumbledore and Blair and Dan decided to accompany me on the train to where I could get a shuttle to the hotel, for which I was very grateful (especially after I found out how late they got home that night.)

At this point I was so tired and hot that I didn't care that the motel was a dump, warm and humid inside (although the AC worked fine once it was turned on), with a room that smelled vaguely of the minty smell of toilet cleaner, and free wireless internet that was only available in the minuscule, warm, humid lobby.  There was no room service or even restaurant, just takeout menus.  While attempting to get some work done (I'm paid hourly as a contractor and if I don't work, I don't get paid, and with my contract ending Wednesday, I need all the hours I can put in) in the lobby, with Dumbledore tethered to my chair, I ordered Dominos, including plain chicken for Dumble.  We took the food back to the room, and I peeled and pulled apart the chicken for him.  I should have rinsed off the fat too, I realized later; it was very greasy, but thankfully he has suffered no ill effects.

We slept very poorly.  Dumble kept getting enraged by the dog in the mirror wall across from the bed, and would not be reassured by being brought over to meet the stranger close up.  I tossed and turned with the uncomfortable bed, mediocre pillows and loud, unfamiliar AC- not to mention traffic sounds, and noises from other patrons.  We got up at 4:45 to make a 5:30 shuttle back to the airport.


I very nearly made it on to the 8am flight, but there were only middle seats available, and she ran out of time to get someone to switch (dog carriers won't fit under the middle seats) when she started receiving conflicting orders to hold the plane for some 9 people who still hadn't boarded and to lock  up and get on the plane so it could take off.  She was running down the jetway last I saw her.

I got a boarding pass for the flight I was confirmed on, a flight taking off around 3, with a stop in Salt Lake City.  With hours to kill, I set up at one of the workstations, which have the most uncomfortable seats I've encountered in a long time.  For one thing stools are problematic for short people, my feet don't rest comfortably where normal folks would - they dangle.  For another, the seats themselves were backless and shaped like a wooden version of a tractor seat.  A couple of hours of that was more than I could take, but there was nowhere comfortable to plug in the laptop.  I had lunch and spent an hour getting a seated chair massage and a foot massage, hoping to make up for the lack of sleep, avoid getting the heebie-jeebies in my legs during the flight and to un-ache muscles punished by puppy backpacks, and lifting and hauling my carry on (which contains two laptops and other essentials, but no dog kibble, a situation I will rectify the next time I fly with Dumbledore.)

I boarded the plane and settle Dumble underneath.  I was in the aisle seat and soon a young couple came up to my row.  She too had a boarding pass for seat 6C, but there was no one currently in the window seat, so they settled in to see what would happen.  But shortly thereafter a young man showed up with a ticket for the window seat.  The girl volunteered to be reseated in case there were only middle seats.  In the midst of everything I was informed that mine was the bogus boarding pass, but they found space for the girl, so I stayed on the plane.

When it landed in Salt Lake, passengers continuing to Long Beach were asked to deplane (for cleanup I think), but we were told we could leave our carry-ons.  I asked a flight attendant about where I was supposed to sit for the Long Beach Leg, given that the young couple was only ticketed through Salt Lake, so there was probably someone ticket for my seat to Long Beach.  She advised me to talk to them when they got set up at the gate.

It turned out that I was not even on the manifest for the Long Beach leg, and probably shouldn't have even been on the flight to begin with, that the flight was full and they would get me on it if there were any no shows, and that there were no more flights to CA that night.  About then I realized that the ticket agent in New York had not been so lovely after all.  While I waited, a fellow passenger bought Dumbledore a bottled water and we cut up a plastic cup so he could have a drink.  He was whining to go potty, but I wouldn't have been able to get back thorough security without a boarding pass.  I found some newspaper in the trash and encouraged him to use it, but he was unimpressed.

They were unable to get me on the flight and unable to retrieve my suitcase, which I hoped would be waiting for me when I eventually got to Long Beach.  This time though, the supervisor happily got me situated with a hotel, making the reservation himself, and making sure they were okay with the dog, and getting them to come pick me up in their shuttle.  While he was setting this up, told me we could finish up at the check in desk so I could take Dumble outside.  He told me where to meet him and I headed for the the outside.

I made a mad dash through an airport shop looking for something to wear, not knowing what would be available outside of security or at the hotel, and took Dumble outside.  He peed for EVER.  Every time I thought he surely had to be finished, he kept going.  Poor baby!  He'd been in the crate for 17 hours without complaint.  I'm amazed at what an even-tempered, well behaved guy he is.

The rest of the story goes much smoother.  The hotel (a Comfort Inn) was nice - clean, up to date, no funny smells, comfy bed and pillows, no dogs in mirror walls, internet in the room, fee breakfast, room service (burger for me and a plain chicken breast for Dumble.)  The front desk clerk even had a little box of laundry soap for me.  I got back to the airport in plenty of time, made my flight no problem, my suitcase was waiting for me, my aunt picked me up and I was at the office by 1pm.

I learned some valuable lessons, like always travel with kibble and clean underwear in your carry on.  But some of my fellow passengers from Sunday evening's original flight may not have fared even so well as I did.  The only other Long Beach flight on Monday besides the 8 am that I didn't get on, and the 3 o'clock I did get on, was the 6 o'clock flight that night, and guess what?  They canceled it.

Dan's Middle School Graduation

He's been at this school since he was in preschool - as have 15 out of the 29 kids in his class.  He's with his preschool teacher in the last photo.